Proposing to your partner is one of the most challenging and scary times in a relationship – of course, you’re confident she’s going to say yes, but there’s never a guarantee! Although we can’t totally eliminate the nerves or stresses, we can offer some tips on making the day more relaxing and straightforward to steady your nerves and help you get into the moment.
Ask for permission
One of the reasons why some men find proposing stressful is because they first must ask for permission from their partner’s parents. According to Refinery29, 77% of men asked for either the bride’s father’s or both parents’ permission before proposing. The truth is that you don’t have to, but it’s customary and allows you to build a closer bond with your future father and mother-in-law. Sure, it’s awkward and nerve-wracking, but getting this out of the way early on will make the actual proposal day less stressful, knowing you have their approval.
Get the right ring
Something else that can cause unnecessary stress is choosing between the many hundreds of engagement rings on offer, and having confidence that your partner will like the one you ended up with. One workaround is to buy the ring once you’ve proposed, but that means you’ll go down on one knee empty-handed and break tradition. We recommend speaking to her closest friends and asking for their advice on a ring, but only if you have confidence in their secret-keeping abilities; the last thing you want is for the cat to get out of the bag before the big day. And remember: the ring really isn’t all that important; it’s the thought that counts.
Speak to your pals
Perhaps one of the reasons why people find proposals so stressful is because they have to do it on their own with no support from friends or family. The truth is, it’s easier to keep your lips sealed and save the surprise for everyone, but if you’re worrying or struggling, speak to a friend or two who’ve already gone through the process for some pointers. They can’t do it for you, but they can give you some advice on calming yourself down, and be there to give you some moral support before you make the move. Talking it out almost always helps you!
Propose somewhere quiet
Finally, if you’re not a fan of being the center of attention, consider proposing somewhere quiet, away from other people. You could make it really intimate and propose at home over a bottle of wine, or with close friends at a dinner party. Taking away any potential distractions and causes for anxiety will allow you to enjoy the process more, so don’t be afraid to do so.
Whatever you end up doing, we wish you the best of luck with your proposal. Relax, breathe, and have fun: here’s to the start of the rest of your life. Congratulations to the happy couple.
Michelle Johnson